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Thursday, January 04, 2007

Hard Mornings

You ever wake up thinking about all the bad things in your life - as if someone else is making you think these things?
This morning, upon opening my peepers in vivid grogginess, my bed became bedlam as my grey jello began to cycle through many negative matters. This was completely against my consent, an alien force (figuratively speaking of course) created this mobius strip of frustrations that danced around like candy nightmares forcing me to stay in bed.
I grimaced as the thoughts went through their fourth of fifth cycle..
Too early to meditate, too late to go back to sleep - I force myself out of bed and out of the anger and depression as much as possible - as much as it takes to get out of bed.
Bed is such a prison during these times, because all I want to do is go back into oblivion and dreams. I was such a happier person a month ago, so normal, so "right" and motivated. What the hell happened? I hate what I've stumbled into, and I'm trying my hardest to get out of it. I like a more positive disposition. This is a waste of a post.
At least I get to put another cute pic up to perk someone else up ;) Don't you love it?

Again, don't worry 'bout me, I will get through this insanity. Probably my pills need changing.

1 comment:

buddamom said...

Hey Em,
Moving post...I'll email with some thoughts (don't want to air business here..kwim).
Hang in there...
Much Love Kira